hello @MDT 

I'd like to offer congrats on the new job you are starting, but I can understand why you feel average and depressed, you've got so much going on.

Sometimes if I am overwhelmed/overthinking I find it helpful to do a 'brain dump' and write everything down that I'm thinking about (as you have done in your message today) and then categorise each thing that I'm thinking about, and decide if I need to think about it now, or if I can schedule a time to think about it later, when it is more relevant.  Then I put it in my calendar as a future task.  

I wonder how you are going to fit in everything that you want to do, it sounds like with a full time job, another job in analytics, full time study in 2022, and a new relationship, that you might need to invent about 4 extra days in your week to fit it all in?  

I admire your resolve to go to the gym, I need to start swimming again, I've been putting it off.  And yes, great that you changed your plans today and cleared the decks to take pressure off yourself.  Sometimes it truly is all that we need, to be able to breathe and not be rushing off to something.