Dear @Exoplanet
I saw that you were on line and am hoping to catch you if you still are.
Only if you feel like responding.
I am saddened by more news of your health update.
I really am speechless.
I know and realise that you know that this insidious disease is affecting so many and the majority of us I believe would know someone impacted at some stage of our lives.
This does not help you at all.
This does not take away all of those emotions racing through you, in particular rage of some kind that I sense when I read about the insensitivity of your family members.
I feel furious myself reading what was said to you by your daughter. I know some might tell me people say things that they do not mean when they cannot deal with stuff that terrifies them or is not within their capacity to deal with.
I listen to horrific stuff from my son when he is in psychotic states which is quite frequently in the last couple of months of the year due to his life stuff.
Regardless of my love for him and empathy around his terror; I let him know that he cannot speak to me like that.
So love; fear; rage and much more do become intermingled.
Whether or not he is capable of hearing I will never know.
I can tell myself though that I respect myself and will continue to not let people verbally abuse me.
You have that right and please, please put yourself first.
I know that you are protecting her by telling her after Christmas.
This I understand as a mother myself.
This is you showing how loving a mother you are and have been. I have always recognised this in you.
You have compassion and empathy along with such drive to survive on your own.
My warrior friend, you are to me.
Life is just a question mark to me.
I have said too much.
I hope that I have not offended you in using the example with my son.
I hoped to emphasise strongly no matter how many years we hold our children; love them deeply despite their behaviours; lack of communication; we must not let them derail our self love and self respect with their uncontrolled outbursts.
Sophia1
