I had been feeling a lot better symptom wise and am starting to function better since my last big break out.  Thankfully my daughter who is supportive and me for her issues is taking a break away.  I really love her but having to hold it together to support her can be hard when i dont feel strong.  I also found out my brother has cancer recently and i think that was just too much along with the day to day stuff for myself.

I am realizing after visiting my brother recently that i dont want to play the family games anymore it really does my head in.  I want to support him in his journey but i think i want to do it at a distance.  I am sick of being kicked around and blamed when the sun doesnt shine (thats how it seems).  Face to face just becomes a battleground and i cant do it anymore.  I am not the person they think they know and i struggle to maintain their perception since i keep my Did secret.  Only my ex and my kids are aware.