What’s next?

[NatureLover]

Good to see you @Lee82  🙂

Wishing you good wishes for your EMDR therapy over the next 4 weeks... Hoping your anxiety about it is manageable and the time goes fast. 💙

[Zoe7]

Hugs and hugs and hugs @Lee82 (and @Bellarose75 ) 

[Eve7]

My dear @Lee82 ,

How has your week been? I’ve thought about you every day and so hope it’s going well for you.

Lots of loving hugs

💚🤗💕🤗💚

[Lee82]

Hi to all my forum friends. 
I hope you are all doing well. 
I am in the middle of my third week in hospital and it has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. 
My first day here I had to isolate for 27 hours until I got my COVID test results. I was not allowed out of my room during that time. That was really rough to do because I couldn't even go out for a smoke. But I had all my meals delivered to me and I had my diamond paintings to keep me distracted. 
My one on one EMDR sessions are on tuesdays and fridays. My first session was pretty cruisy. It was all about thinking of  one person who is my calm person, one person who is my wise person and one person who is my protector. These people will be called upon during my sessions as I need them. My EMDR therapist is absolutely lovely. I have a great connection with her and I feel completely safe around her. She is amazing and really knows her stuff. She is very good at keeping me grounded and feeling safe. 
The sessions have been very overwhelming and tough to get through so for this reason I am gratefull I am in hospital because your brain continues to process things for 72 hours after the session. So a couple days after my sessions I am dealing with a lot of memory and body base feelings. It can get pretty overwhelming and very very tiring. 
On Wednesday's and Thursday's I have group sessions and in these sessions we just learn about different things like grounding techniques and we talk about nightmares and triggers and lots of different things that relate to our mental health. These sessions a really tough for me because I suffer from social anxiety so being in a small room woth 10 people is a lot for me. Social anxiety is something that I struggle with a lot in here. I keep to myself mostly in my room but I do try and at least eat in the dinning room with others but even then I cannot stay too long because the noise in the room is very triggering for me. I have become very sensitive to noise and touch. It is very frustrating. 
I have had some very very low days where all I have done is sleep most of the day away but I have also had some ok days too. I miss my 2 boys so very much but they are doing very well living at mums and spending the weekends with my brother. Their father is an a**hole and hasn't seen his kids since June. I speak to them every morning and every night. Unfortunately because of COVID I cannot have any visitors and I am also not allowed out. This has made things even harder to deal with. Thank god for FaceTime. Lol

Anyway I won't bore you all with too much more. I just hope you are all doing well and you all have been in my thoughts everyday. I cherish each and everyone of you and feel very blessed to have you all in my life. 
take care and stay safe 

@Bellarose75 @Eve7 @Zoe7 @NatureLover @Shaz51 @Emelia8 @Anastasia @greenpea @outlander @Sans911 @Snowie @Faith-and-Hope 

[Emelia8]

Great to see you again @Lee82 .  In fact I was thinking about you only yesterday and was intending to post to ask how you were going.  I was aware that you were in hospital undergoing EMDR during this time.  And having done EMDR myself several years back, I know how hard it is. 

I am so glad that you have a good connection and feel safe with, and confident in, your EMDR therapist.  That is huge!  I agree too that its a very good thing that you are having the therapy in a hospital setting, because you are right that the sessions bring up such a lot of memories and feelings.  The effects of which last for days afterwards.

Its also good that you are getting to spend some time in a more social setting.  I know its hard for your social anxiety but if you are able to overcome that, or even reduce it somewhat, it can make a huge difference in your life going forward.

Soooo good that you are talking to your boys twice a day, and that they are doing well with your Mum and also spending some time with your brother.  They will be incredibly happy to have you home with them again when the time comes, but in the meantime they are doing fine.

Its lovely to see you again, I have missed you.

Emelia 💞

[Snowie]

@Lee82 💗💗

[Anastasia]

@Lee82 🌸💞🌸

[Zoe7]

Lovely to hear from you @Lee82 and thank you so much for the update. It seems you are doing well with your therapy despite all you are dealing with. It is so hard to do so intensely so I am really glad you are where you can get the most support 

[Faith-and-Hope]

❤️ @Lee82 .....

[Eve7]

Thank you so much for the update @Lee82  I was wondering about you and pleased to read you have a great therapist and that you’re in a safe environment.

well done so far! It won’t be long until you’re back home with your boys. I hope the social anxiety is beginning to ease.

Tons of love

💜💜🤗🤗💜💜