Fragile

[Anastasia]

So sorry to hear @Sophia1 😔

Hugs for you both 💛

@Appleblossom 

[Anastasia]

I just made a hair appointment...

I ended up hysterically crying, I realise that I am not doing well today with my anxiety but that was a surprise. No need to respond @Sophia1 @Appleblossom just sharing as I feel so alone here.

Hugs and love to you both ❤️🤗

[Sophia1]

How are you feeling now @Anastasia 

Caring for one of our children no matter the age just drains away the majority of our energy..

Auto pilot is a term that you would be very familiar with..

Pushing through no matter what with our unconditional love for those we gave birth to and carry in our hearts always..

We forget to stop and check on our own health as autopilot does not notice us only the ones we love..

The human body and mind of course are not created with autopilot as part of our being..

Crying...shaking whatever the body response is indicates we have forgotten about ourselves for too long a period..

You my dear Anastasia are giving all of your love...energy to your son as he is still the beautiful baby you gave birth to..

Now is your time as hard as it is...I have been through this too many times..

Hard to apply to ourselves...yet so often given as caring advice to others..

He knows that you love him...time out for you will not change that or make his situation worse...

The opposite in fact...he will notice more energy in you and take that in..

Feeling all alone is possibly because he is yours and nobody can understand the way that you do as his mum.You want it to be fixed and to go away for ever..

In reality you are not all alone..

You have forum members...

You have support in real life that you can turn to if you choose to..

I have heard every word that you have said...I feel your pain and know my own..

Wrap yourself in a cuddly blanket...

If you are at work...go home...compassionate leave ...

do you have a pet or a teddy bear...

I cuddle my teddy bear and talk to him as though I am talking to my son..

my teddy bear does not shout back or tell me off...

Please also tell that guilt if it has risen it's hideous form to take a hike...visualise it running away from you..good riddance to it..

You are a very loving mum...you can do no more at the moment...you will pass through this feeling..

Rest dear Anastasia...restore some of that energy...give some of that unconditional love to yourself..

you deserve that love the same as your son..

this is also what he wants for you

take care

💜💚💛

[Sophia1]

@Appleblossom 

sending you some love and hearts also

💛💚💜

[Anastasia]

Thank you dear @Sophia1 

I am touched and grateful beyond words and yes tears flowing yet again. 

Thank you for truly, deeply hearing me, understanding and digging deep to reply.

I adore you.

I wish you didn't understand so much because that would mean you too wouldn't be living as you are. 

Hugs and love to you and dear @Appleblossom 💛💚

[Sophia1]

Yes @Anastasia 

I understand what you are saying..

I am very deep and for me to be able to help another with such incredible pain..although I feel the pain and hurt....I gain as I realise myself that I am not all alone with it either..

I know that feeling all too well.

I feel that far too much so you have helped me also..

This is why I stay on the forums..

When I find others who have pain that is so real...if I can support and let them know that they are not alone even for that small period of time...I feel that I have helped more of us..

in a way I have brought us all together...

united in our pain...strength gained from that...helping us to continue on..

probably sounds like mumbo jumbo..

Crying will help release some of the build up also

💜

[Anastasia]

Never mumbo jumbo @Sophia1 just grateful, deep respect and love 💛

[Sophia1]

Good morning lovely ladies @Appleblossom @Anastasia 

Thinking of you both and sending you some sunshine 💛

Thought that I might invite greenpea over here would that be alright with you @Appleblossom 

Sophia 💜💚💙

[Appleblossom]

@Anastasia 

I just saw your post now.  Tears come when they do.

Like @Sophia1 

I wish nobody else had the terrible experience of lovling grown children struggling with mental health issues. It matters greatly to me that this thread of mine receives some tender care from real friends.

Thank you both.

I am still going very gently.  Brought him home last night, but had to go back to get his coomputer.  He is being perfect son.  Fingers crossed as we move forward.

I love our @greenpea 

[Anastasia]

@Appleblossom 💜

@Sophia1 💛

@greenpea 💚