Lived Experience Forum

[Lauralou]

Just so damn lonely.

65 kids all gone.  Mum is 91 Thanks be to God I don't live with her.  Her greatest wish is to have servants.

Being inlockdown am doing it all on my own.

I miss seeing my friends and having the freedom to have a day out.  I don't often.   

[Jynx]

@Lauralou  that is so tough. We aren't meant to be separated from people for so long. I hope it helps to get it out, I'm here to listen 

[Carlachris]

@Lauralou, hi, I'm feeling the same. I'm in Country Victoria and it's like a ghost town here at the moment. No one is even walking their dogs anymore. Until a year ago I was happily cooking for four adults as we share a big house with my brother in a unit out the back my mother who has since left to live elsewhere due to illness and my husband six weeks ago had a breakdown and is in care.

It's so hard not being able to see the grandkids. 

I honestly don't know what to do with myself. I'm lucky really but the drag of loneliness is starting to really get to me. I've done everything I can think of and I could start being creative but until now it's been freezing cold wet weather. I'm hoping for a few more beautiful days like today and maybe finding a bit of inspiration. Hope the same for you. Where do you live? What do you like to do with your time? 

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @Lauralou ,

Im with you in this. I live on my own and have always loved it because I'm out all day, everyday, and like to come home to a quiet, peaceful house at the end of each day.

Lockdown has thrown a spanner in the works. Day in, day out, I'm stuck by myself, not being able to hang out at restaurants or cafes. This Lockdown has affected me most.

In saying that, I remember self care as much as possible. I keep a regular sleeping, eating and exercising routine. As much as possible, I join in virtual community events such as weekly live fitness classes and mindfulness classes. I'm also thinking of initiating a lego club for children around me where we can sit and build lego virtually then share our work. I also spend more time on these forums because it's a kind of 'therapy' for me.

Im just keeping occupied so that Lockdown doesn't get the better of me.

 Being lonely is certainly hard - I totally acknowledge that. Are there ways for you to make any connections at this time? Or are there projects you'd like to work with during this time?

We're here for each other. Please continue to reach out.

BPDSurvivor

[Lost9]

@BPDSurvivor @Lauralou @Carlachris @Jynx 

Hi there all,

I'm so sorry you are all in lockdown and lonely. I live on the Mornington Peninsula which is about 3/4 hr from Melbourne. It is really a tourist area and comes alive in Summer. It is generally deserted at the moment but there are people taking their dog for a walk or their children for exercise. We are blessed to have lovely neighbours. Some friends of ours and neighbours left us some flowers from their garden on the doorstep. Our next door neighbours left us some eggs their chickens layed on our doorstep with a lovely note asking how we were in lockdown and knowing they are out of work at the moment, due to lockdown, it was a particularly lovely gesture. I'm trying to think of something nice I can do for our neighbours in return. Maybe bake something nice. Perhaps you would consider doing something for your neighbours if you are well enough? Just a thought. Caring for ourselves and each other is particularly important at the moment.

lost9

[Lauralou]

Thankyou so much.  I think a lot of my issues are that I can't see my psychologist.

I don't  like burdening my children with my issues

Take care 😔

[BPDSurvivor]

Thank you for your lovely post @Lost9 . It's great you can do something for your neighbours. I went to drop chocolates off for my neighbours last week. 

Although I live alone, lockdown has meant working more at home. I wish I could just sit outside and enjoy the whole day in the sunshine. But yes @Lost9 , you are right, thinking and helping others definitely brings satisfaction.

@Lauralou , I'm sorry you cannot see your psychologist. I would really struggle if I couldn't speak to my psychologist. I have my appointments either on the phone or via zoom. I have 2 sessions a week for the time being - while I am in lockdown.

Also, it looks like our Lockdown in Melb will be extended... so here's our new normal. I acutally just want a good rest.

BPDSurvivor

[Lauralou]

So sad. Am sorry about your Mum but sometimes it's a necessary step.  I am sad about your husband I too struggle with Complex PTSD and have put myself in hosp 4xs now.  I don't know what it's like for those left behind. I only know it helped enormously.  We only allowed visitors once every two weeks so covid we not impacted.  I do hope prognosis is good and that you don't have to worry about them.  I live in Penrith Western Sydney where all the idiots are not wearing masks.  Have started some sashiko stitching.  I have always embroidered but this is new to me.  It's TV,

Having 2 Jack Russells vying for space on my lap along with the jeans jacket, needle and thread.

Hope you find something to do.  I used to lived out on property and I never missed people.  Now in suburbia I  hate it.

Having an array of pets ie horses, cows, chooks, dogs I never seemed to worry about people as much.

Please take care. Hugs

[TFS29]

Thank you @BPDSurvivor I really appreciate your comments. Im in Sydney in an LGA of concern and finding it very difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel  the last week particularly. I'm finding that supporting others during this time moves the focus from me to others and Im really enjoying it! Also, it removes my 'me, me' focus on myself! I woudl love to know what others are doing or have discovered during lockdown that are helping them get through each day? Im finding that having the time to plan for the future, budget and save is particularly satisfying, particularly researching OS travel (which Ive never done before!).