Self harm

[Powderfinger]

Is a break away, some respite possible? @Fluttershy1 

[Fluttershy1]

Not really @Powderfinger 

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @Fluttershy1 ,

I'm not sure of your living situation, but I tend to agree with @Powderfinger . Is there any way you can have respite from your family if they are causing you so much grief?

Sometimes, it's not waiting to be mentally 'stable' before taking action. It's the chicken or the egg scenario. If you stay, you'll probably continue being mentally unstable. If you wait till you are stable, you'll probably never move out. 

Please note, I am not asking you to move out particularly if there are other issues at play. But if you are really that unhappy with your living circumstances, and you have already spoken to them, I guess now it's about finding other ways to manage the situation.

What are your thoughts, @Fluttershy1 ?

BPDSurvivor

Hi @Powderfinger 

[Powderfinger]

Hi @BPDSurvivor 

Hi @Fluttershy1 

I agree here with @BPDSurvivor It would be good to hear your thoughts about this. 

[Fluttershy1]

I agree @BPDSurvivor, it's hard though as I get anxious alone. A lot has happened when I've been on my own. 

hi @Powderfinger 

[BPDSurvivor]

Of course @Fluttershy1 !

Living alone can be quite anxiety-provoking especially for those who have lived with people their entire lives.

I always dreamed of living alone and absolutely loved it. But now I see how selfish I've somewhat become because I eat when I want, sleep when I want, vacuum when I want, cook when I want... living on my own means I don't have to consider anyone else. I am worried that if I ever have to live with people, I'd get stressed out! Also, I've come to see that living alone can be quite isolating, especially during lockdowns.

So I actually think living with people is good. Humans are social beings. Now, the challenge is, how can we collaboratively support you to make the most out of your family situation?

If they are not ready to make changes, then perhaps the change needs to come from you for you to feel better?

I liken this to the weather. Sometimes, the rain and storms are real setbacks. We can't change the weather, but we can change how we react towards it so that we feel better in ourselves. If that means wearing those awesome gumboots and jumping in the puddles, GO FOR IT! Live life to the fullest!

So now @Fluttershy1 , what do your 'gumboots' look like so that you are equipped for the 'rain' and 'storms'?

No need for a quick response. There's a lot of heavy thoughts here.

BPDSurvivor

[Fluttershy1]

It's been a messy week @BPDSurvivor, feeling flat

[BPDSurvivor]

I hear you @Fluttershy1 .

Hugs.

[Fluttershy1]

I feel worthless @BPDSurvivor 

[Powderfinger]

Hi @Fluttershy1 

I had a thought earlier. Could you buy your own fridge and put a lock on it. That way no one can eat your food anymore. I would personally go so far as telling them you did it because they have no respect for you and you are over them stealing your food. What they feel and think is not your problem. Boundaries are needed.