Exo's Exposé

[Exoplanet]

My Goodness @Sophia1 I don't know what I've done to deserve such a caring connection with you, but Thank you. Thank you @Shaz51  @Appleblossom @Faith-and-Hope  @Former-Member & everyone that responds to my doom & gloom! I try to be patient, not complain too much & accept this stage of my life - but it's hard. My family, who has stayed away in droves for decades, all of a sudden love me & I'm not alone . . . but the fact is I am. I've had one Sister come, she couldn't come just to visit, it had to be to clean - though she didn't end up cleaning, she just ended up stressing me out to the max. Other than that I have a private arrangement with a couple that I met locally that bring out what I need from the shops & get me to appts (because I'm leaving them my property in my will as I don't have any money as such to pay them - that Sister has decided she doesn't like them). Mostly I'm sitting at home alone dying. It hurts, it makes me very sick & it's boring. I can't walk my dogs anymore, I can't drive anymore . . . hell I can't walk anymore!

[Appleblossom]

@Exoplanet 

Just sending a "hello" and little distraction ....

On the ground reaching ...Nibbles in old art ....

Love Apple

[Former-Member]

@Exoplanet ❤️ I'm sorry it's been stressful with your sister being around. I know it can be hard for me when people assume what I need.

I don't know your sister, but I know some people need an "excuse"  to visit when the reality of sitting with someone in pain is too difficult. But it sounds like she wanted to be there and maybe didn't know how. Not that that helps with the stress!

We're sitting with you ❤️ 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Bringing you a cup of tea @Exoplanet.

It doesn’t fix anything, but a warm cup in the hand and gentle, caring thoughts are worth something generally …… hugs ❣️ 

[Sophia1]

Hello  

You came to say hello to us. So lovely to hear from you. 

It is great that you have some compassionate neighbours supporting you with shopping and medical appointment transportation. 

It is hard when we have a history of sisters treating us disrespectfully and then at the drop of a pin are gushing all over us. Our on and off family relationships cause too much stress. I know how that feels. Just when we are getting used to them not being around they magically appear and  ……they want to clean our home!.

My twin was exactly the same. I just wanted her to sit still for five seconds and talk to me. Be a sister. I think that might be what you are feeling. Perhaps?

They have to keep busy rather than have eye contact or talk; show any feelings. They are frightened. I still think that they love us in the only way that they can. It is stressful as you need calm not busy. Try to let it go now…

It is hard to read the words that you wrote about how you feel.  

yet I have said to you open up on here. 

So It does not matter how hard it is to read your words. Please keep on writing if it helps you. I am here to support you through this for as long as you want to write about this journey not of your choosing.

I know you worry about not walking your dogs.

I am sure that they are staying closer to you keeping an eye on you. They want to be with you.You know deep down inside that animals know when humans are suffering.

Hang onto that.  They might not be humans who can talk to you.

They can look you in the eye… lay near you... let you cuddle them as close as you can endure.. without too much pain.

Talk to them. They are your family helping you through this time of your life.

You are not on your own in our world here. Be as comfortable as you can 

You don't know what you have done to deserve such a connection......you said

I have known you for a very long time exoplanet, since Mazarita's thread.

You have supported me in the past ...you are my friend lovely lady with the sparkles…

Until next we meet

sending you love that will hold you and reach you through your puppies.

Sophia1

[Shaz51]

sitting with you my @Exoplanet ❤️

[Exoplanet]

OMG I remember Mazy, I miss her so much! @Sophia1  @Mazarita  My journey continues, I have had my 2nd request accepted & I am waiting for the official paperwork for the 3rd. {3 strikes you're out ;)} It won't be long now. I'm thinking within or around a week. I started a new medication, a steroid, which has given me sooooo much relief, better than the strong pain killers!! I just received a proper pressure cushion & an over the bath seat today {the cushion is magic, like the new pills}. I'm feeling the best I have in months; I've even eaten a little more {which also makes me feel so much better :)}. I didn't get to bed until 1am, I was told the new meds may affect my sleep, but I think I can handle it for a week 😉 The thing I've noticed ever since the breast cancer, ever since the dreaded 'C' was said; is I have so much gratefulness for everything I do have, everything that isn't bad - it's a good feeling. Sure, I whinge & whine . . . I'm Human & I've been suffering . . . & that's what suffering Humans do 😉 But I want everyone here to know, that ever since I found this site & all the people in it, it has helped me so much - it has been my only lifeline at times. THANK YOU ALL!!!!!

[Peregrinefalcon]

Hey @Exoplanet! I remember your story from a few months ago. Lovely to see you here again 💛

I am so touched that this is a space you feel safe sharing your story. I am also so happy for you that you are feeling the best that you have in months. We are so grateful for your honesty and willingness to share what is no doubt one of the most private and sensitive times in your life.

What an honour to be able to sit alongside you during this time 💞

[Sophia1]

Hello dear @Exoplanet 

I saw you and had trouble logging in. I am here now thankfully.

I knew that you would remember Mazy as you affectionately call her. 
It is so good to read your news of steroid and cushion..

You are also having your wishes granted which must be a huge relief for you.

What is this nonsense talk of whinge and whine.  That is not our Exoplanet.

You tell it as it is.

I love your directness.

I am thinking that you are not Wonder Woman.

You are Wonder Warrior with sparkles.

How are your beautiful Staffordshires?

When I read your words that you have found gratefulness through your suffering, I feel that you have arrived where you are. 
You are ready. 
You are such a beautiful person and it is an absolute honour to know you.

Thank you so much for allowing myself and others here to be with you at this stage of your journey.

I am here with you every second of the day.

Can you feel me stroking your hand? Let me know if you do not want to be touched.

I will try to check in daily.

You need only do so when you want to. Do it for you not for us.

Sending you love

Look up at the stars in the sky at night if you can and the one that is sparkling is me sending my love and watching over you.

love Sophia1

[Faith-and-Hope]

❤️☕️ @Exoplanet …. I am up during this night, sitting with you, not chocolate in hand.