Lived Experience Forum

[LostAngel]

ill keep this short Im trying my absolute best to remain positive and determined despite an overwhelming feeling of frustration at not getting what I need to get done in a timely matter ,the lockdown in melbourne though Im in regional is affecting my ability to not only see family who live in melbourne but also affecting my ability to purchase a new car which what Im after is in the melbourne area so am unable to travel to purchase a car there as yet,lack of independant transport is frustrating,Im getting out of lockdown but its also very frustrating that family memebrs will still be stuck in lockdown cause they live in Metro melbourne,frustration and at times feelings of anger ,I feel sorry for people stuck in melbourne and feel handicapped /held back in terms of being able to aquire what I need ,I have had to do without the use of having my own car for months now in between being in and out and back in lockdown again,its frstrating,havng to wait agin,and then having to wait repeatedly for things that are needed sooner rather than later and please dont get me started on the day to day,although Im doing everything I can to remain positive,and gratefull and not mess up any good things by reacting and then self sabotaging any good things I wish to have oh its just so frustrating even if Im able to get out of lockdown Im still limited in my ability to travel where Id like to be travelling and seeing who Id love to be seeing I feel limited despite having some sense of personal freedom from midnight tonight ,Im doing my best cause I dont want to feel negative,I want to feel positive I dont want to crumble into my emotions which then would make everything else fail too ,I feel like a failure despite trying so damm hard with lots of things,with self improovement ,with trying to push aside any and all negative feelings and only be gratefull for the good,focus on the good,Im probly bottling all the good things up that I so desperately want to share with those around me ,I want to self improove,spring forward,think of possibilities I feel so held back physically to take those steps forward,also Ive been off my depression meds for about 3 to 4 days now so Thats probly another reason Im feeling like this,anger,ect I am safe though I need to do some self care for rest of the day at least Im expressing my feelings,not sure how other forum friends are going wether or not your currently in or going to be out of lockdown sending love to anyone who needs it 

[AussieRecharger]

Hey @LostAngel 

What are you out to improve on?

[RedHorse]

Hi @LostAngel 

Well done for trying to remain positive and strive for self improvement. I hear your frustration at not being able to go see your family or buy yourself a car because of the lockdowns.

I'm "staying at home" in regional NSW atm and think I can understand how you're feeling. While I have a vehicle, I will take a plane to visit my daughter across the country in WA. For now we make do with regular telephone calls, but it's not as good as the real thing.

You mentioned not taking your depression meds for the last 3 or 4 days in your post. Have you run out or just been forgetful? Either way, this is something you should think about getting back on track with, unless you have a particular reason for not doing so?

I hope you fit some self care into your day, slept well and awake feeling rested and refreshed.

Thinking of you, take care RedHorse 🌹🐴