@silhouetteI think the key question is how do we live in light of the illnesses of our loved ones when they have been through acute phases that have involved attempts?
If your property got flooded how would one feel? How would you feel the next time it rained? Would it make a difference if the rain was heavy or light? Would it make a difference if you had an up to date weather forecast to hand?
Would a flood stop you from ever going out again? If it was raining? In heavy rain only? Only if a storm was forecast and authorities had warned to batten down the hatches?
The answers to these questions are variable and are dependant on factors such as does your property have a permanent or seasonal creek running through it? Do you know previous high water levels? Do you have a flood action plan? Have you access to sand bags? Have you been brought up in a flood zone or is it new?
After a flood, initially light rain might set off an alarm in your mind but as reason quells that alarm one is able to relax more.
To my mind, if one lives in a flood zone, adequate preparation is the key.
I believe that if our loved ones have chosen us to be their primary carer, part of the deal is we need to be part of their safety plan. This does not mean in any way that we take responsibility for their illness, or impinge on their self governance (bearing in mind capacity) indeed it is important that they are empowered to do what needs to be done and make appropriate treatment decisions. This does not mean at times we will not be afraid. As a loved one, learning how to respond in a healthy way has made a huge difference for me.
I think realising that when it is not raining, or if the rain is light, flooding is unlikely, staying home and putting out sandbags can be counterproductive. That safety measures are in place if a flood is to come and doing scheduled reviews to ensure procedures are up to date and all are aware of what needs to be done if the need arises.
I remember the first time I went out in my own after my husband's attempt, I was so very scared but we cannot let this illness stop us from living, indeed I firmly believe we can live well in spite of a diagnosis. We have a plan in place, it is regularly reviewed, we are doing what needs to be done to prevent relapse.
I do not know how I would go now if Mr D again became psychotic or suicidal, but hope by putting into place the action plan, treatment for such an acute phase will be successful and I will have the strength to deal with the aftermath as recovery from the crisis to remission takes place.
